Plant exotic

When Life Gets in the Way

A month ago, I had a baby. Just over two months ago, we moved to a new house. I am hoping that those two reasons can justify the lack of blogging over the past while.

Baby Lennon @ 2 Weeks. Photo: StudioVie Photography

I have stressed over the past few days about posting something new this week, finally, and then I ended up not finding the time to do so, until now. Even now, it's going to have to be a short post.

I love to write, so I will not stop blogging. However, I am thinking that for the next month or two, it is reasonable to say that I will probably not write any posts. Unfortunately, I have other responsibilities that take precedence over this blog right now, and until my baby is sleeping more at night and is down to a more predictable schedule (I'm crossing my fingers that this happens soon), my hours are jam packed with him, my toddler, keeping my house and in another week, starting back to work!

Thanks for reading, and I sincerely hope to get back into writing very soon!

-Christina

What Is Healthy?

Sometimes it seems to me that every couple of months, I hear about another study that has found another food or health product to be dangerous to our health. Moreover, I’m pretty sure that over my lifetime of 30 years, some foods or health products have zig-zagged from being deemed “healthy” to being deemed “unhealthy.”

For example, a few months ago, I read an article that a few people on my Facebook had posted: “7 Things You Should Never Eat.” I don’t know about you, but my reaction as I scanned down the list of untouchables was, “Oh, crap. Oh, crap. Oh, crap.” I think I was guilty of eating all seven things, and on a regular basis. I figured that some of the items I could replace with the healthier alternative, but some of them I would probably continue eating (like regular apples and regular potatoes--those are healthy foods themselves, right?).

Then, my mother-in-law told me about how Johnson’s Baby Shampoo was found to contain an ingredient that releases formaldehyde. My reaction again was, “Oh, crap.” I promptly went upstairs after reading the article to toss my bottle of Johnson’s Baby Shampoo in the garbage. I decided I’d just stick with the organic baby shampoos and washes that you can get at the Superstore and be done with it.

Most recently, my mom told me about an article she read about a study that found high levels of arsenic in cereal bars and baby cereals that contained brown rice syrup. As someone on a gluten-free diet, which limits my options for “healthy” cereal bars to the organic kind that generally contains brown rice syrup, I threw my hands up in the air and said again, “Oh, crap!” That made me the most angry. Seriously?  What next? I am really limited with what I can eat already, and now people are saying that a major ingredient in a ton of organic, gluten-free products is poisonous? What’s worse for me? Eating gluten or eating arsenic? Or eating neither and further limiting my options like a chump?

I wouldn’t call myself one of those 100% organic, super-health-conscious people that will go raw or vegan or whatever just to be healthy. I still buy meat at the grocery store instead of buying organic. Although I use some beauty products that are organic, some still have the odd paraben. However, I would consider myself relatively health-conscious. I have started reading labels on beauty products and will avoid those that contain a BILLION parabens. I figure that being gluten-free steers me into the organic section of stores often enough that I eat pretty well when it comes to “carb” foods like cerealr, cereal bars (although not anymore?), pastas, etc. I love trying new recipes for smoothies or baked goods that have sugar alternatives or tons of health benefits. I often have to bribe my toddler with fruits and vegetables to eat his other food, and so I am hoping that I’m making a good impression on him since we always have a wide variety of healthy food to eat.  

Being a pretty average person, then, when it comes to my food and health care products, this kind of rigmarole associated with what’s beneficial and what’s detrimental this week is really frustrating. Should we be cutting out every single thing that someone calls “bad for you”? Is that being responsible, or is that being extreme?

Take coffee for example. I think that over my lifetime coffee has been in the good books and the bad books several times over. (For the record, coffee will always be in my good books.) So what then? Will we find out ten years from now that the arsenic levels in organic brown rice syrup are actually OK, and no harmful effects have been discovered from regularly eating foods sweetened with it?

Also, if we take the attitude that we should avoid what the latest research tells us we should avoid, does that not create some level of paranoia when it comes to food selection? I mean, who’s to say that another well-known, well-trusted, often-consumed food or health/beauty product might become lethal in a few months? Until extensive research is done on every product and every food out there, how will we ever know if everything we are using and consuming is free of health hazards? How will we ever know?

Where do you draw the line? Do you react to every scare out there? Or do you figure that if we’ve been using these products (like Johnson’s Baby Shampoo) or eating these foods (apples that aren’t organic) for decades and we’re fine, that we should just keep consuming/eating them? After all, if I learned anything in my Biology 101 course in university, there are no "causes" for cancer. It's always a combination of events that result in cell mutation--right?

Although these articles frustrate me, I do try to keep some balance with my decision-making. Some products are easy enough to discard and replace with something better. Others aren’t.  While I can appreciate the choices of some people to go completely organic, I am not sure that’s right for my family. Could we afford to go completely organic? Do we have the time to drive to every different place to get all the different organic stuff? Where do you stop? Where do you draw the line?

After all, sometimes I wonder if certain healthy choices are so beneficial that they far outweigh the potential detriments of other choices.

If I use bath products that contain parabens and/or mineral oil, but I eat a lot of broccoli and drink my full quota or more of filtered water every day, then am I at lesser risk of being negatively affected by the bath products?

If I buy ground beef that isn’t organic, but I exercise regularly, is my body then better equipped to face the potentially harmful ingredients in the beef?

If I eat apples that are covered in pesticides, but I wash them, then doesn't that at least reduce the amount of pesticides I'm consuming, and aren't the health benefits of the apple itself enough to counteract the harmful effects of the traces of pesticides?

I hope I don’t sound like I’m just trying to compromise. I am trying to consider these facts and balance them without having to subsist on less and less options (that are often more and more expensive) as time goes by.

What do you think? What is your opinion on all of this? Do you get as frustrated as I've gotten?

A Really Good Gift

When we first listed our house for sale, someone told me that she would pray for the right buyer at the right time, and for everything to work out so that afterward, we could say, “Wow, that was totally God at work.”

Well, that did happen, and so I must share with you what I learned from the whole experience because I believe that without God, it wouldn’t have happened this way.

We basically listed our house to downsize to something a little less expensive and a little more affordable so that I could continue working part-time for the next few years when our kids are small. Our house was on the market for almost 3 months.

When we started looking for houses, we went through one house in particular that we both really liked. We had a really good feeling about the house, and I genuinely believed that it was “our house.” It wasn’t perfect; it needed lots of work, yet I still found myself really liking it. I figured that since I really liked something that I wouldn’t expect myself to like, it must be God giving me peace that it was the right house, if that makes any sense.

We put two offers in on that house, and both were rejected because we had a house to sell. We figured that if it was meant to be, our house would sell and that house would remain on the market for us to buy eventually.

That didn’t happen. I was kind of crushed, and I wondered why that house had seemed so perfect. We began using that house as a benchmark, and honestly thought that there wouldn’t be any other house like it out there in our price range. The thought that something better was still out there didn’t seem possible, so I denied that thought permanent residence in my mind.

As for selling our house—if you’ve ever had a house on the market, you know how frustrating it is. We developed a “code” for preparing for a showing, and we kept to the code, even when we didn’t want to. As my pregnant belly continued to grow, washing the floors continued to get more difficult. We kept on with it, though. I remember the sound of the vacuum cleaner turning on eventually made me cringe with distaste because we had cleaned our house so many times without selling it that I hated the sound.

There were several potential buyers whom we thought would end up being “the one.” We even had a person who had previously lived in our house for 20 years come through! If anyone was going to be the right buyer, I’d put my money on that person! However, we saw no offers.

Then one day this month, we got an offer. We accepted. We hadn’t found a house yet, so we had to act fast.

Somehow, our discussions with our agent turned to a particular house that we had seen on the market but originally weren’t interested in. After a series of events, we ended up very quickly buying that house. A further few events led us to make a decision and take a risk in order to keep the house, and I know we ended up making the right decision.

There are two thoughts that have resonated in my mind these past few weeks:

First, if events hadn’t transpired exactly as they had, we never would have ended up with the house we bought, which is a really good and perfect house. Now that I’m on the other side of this experience, I can see and understand how God has masterfully choreographed a series of events to take place to bring us to where we ended up. Even the disappointment we experienced in losing out on the first house we loved was necessary to bring us to our new house. Moreover, He choreographed events and decisions that would grow us spiritually and teach us some really valuable lessons.

Second, during this whole process, we vocalized countless times that we would have to end up making a sacrifice somewhere. We assumed that buying a house in a lower price range required a sacrifice—whether it be size, quality of construction, location, number of renovations/repairs needed, number of features, etc. Here’s the big “however”: Somehow, we ended up “downsizing” to a house that requires no sacrifices whatsoever. In other words, we’re “downsizing,” but we aren’t.

I grew spiritually through this experience because I learned first-hand the generous, giving nature of God. He gives us gifts “just because.” He gives us gifts with no strings attached.

What was the most amazing gift you ever received for Christmas or for your birthday or just because? In my opinion, the greatest gifts are not the ones you ask for and thus expect, but the ones you never imagined you’d ever receive because they were too perfect to imagine—the ones you never expected because they were too good to expect. The greatest gift is the one that you can marvel over for days, weeks and months after receiving it—in awe that someone put so much thoughtabout you into it and really did find the perfect gift just for you.  

My house-selling, house-buying experience is just one little example of how God loves to bestow gifts on His children. I can’t comprehend this situation in any other way than being a gift. We didn’t ask for it. We didn’t deserve it. We didn’t know it existed or was possible. We even grumbled and complained and were frustrated so many times, like immature children who want to make sure they get something good for Christmas and get upset when they find out they aren’t going to get what they thought they wanted. Thankfully, our childish complaints and tears of frustration didn’t deter God from handing us such a wonderful gift.

Sometimes receiving a perfect, amazing, valuable, special gift can be really difficult. I think many people would prefer to ask for something and know what’s coming. I think many people would prefer to get what they think they deserve—no more and no less. I think many people, including myself, think they know what they want or need and stubbornly tend to reject any other ideas before they’ve even seen or heard them. Maybe it’s human nature.

Through this series of events, we had to decide to take a risk and accept the gift God was laying out on the table for us, even though we didn’t feel we deserved it.

God has an abundance of specially-selected, better-than-expected gifts for all of us because He loves us completely and unconditionally, but it may take some time and experience to grow accustomed to receiving them. Why not start today and open yourself up to receiving and accepting gifts from God—especially the gifts you may not feel you deserve?

James 1:17: Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, Who does not change like shifting shadows.  

Perseverance

I had been doing so well at blogging consistently every week, and then life just got in the way. However, my lack of blogging over the past few weeks does not reflect a lack of wondering or thinking or questioning things; in fact, I think I have been doing more mental processing lately than usual.

Over the past few weeks, I have been contemplating the concept of perseverance.

Here’s why I’ve been thinking about perseverance: I have been rigorously exercising what I hope is perseverance over the past couple of months while my house has been for sale. If you’ve ever sold/bought a house, you understand completely: it’s not always a fun, easy, straightforward process. It really necessitates perseverance—how else could you handle selling your house (unless you’re one of those lucky people whose house is snatched up a couple weeks after being on the market)?

To share with you my thoughts on perseverance, I have to explain my thoughts on bravery.

I’ve been reading A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin (yes, another great medieval fantasy). Near the beginning of the book, the character Bran is watching his father, Eddard, execute a criminal. Bran is only seven years old, so naturally, he’s a little afraid of what he is going to see. He asks his father if you can still be brave even when you’re afraid. His father replies, “That is the only time you can be brave” (Martin, 1996, p. 18).

I thought that was interesting. Before reading that chapter, when I pictured someone who is brave, I pictured someone fearless when others would be afraid. However, Martin has presented a very different perspective: we can only exercise bravery in the face of fear—when we are afraid. This suggests that a brave person isn’t necessarily fearless; a brave person just recognizes the value or the necessity in facing his/her fears and not letting those fears get in the way of things that are more important (in Bran’s case, keeping his eyes open and watching the execution so as to prove his strength as a “man,” his political standing as a Stark and his likelihood of becoming a knight). The whole situation scared Bran, but he controlled his fears for the sake of something more important, thus exercising bravery.

I wondered if the same logic can be applied to perseverance. I have been starting to wonder whether you can really “persevere” if you are frustrated, disappointed and in the middle of throwing up your hands in the air and exclaiming, “That’s it! I give up! I can’t do anything about this anymore, so I’m just going to let things happen as they will.”

What is perseverance? I found two dictionary definitions:

1.                   Steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success.

2.                   Continuance in a state of grace leading finally to a state of glory.

Before this week, I always thought that someone who persevered basically had a calm smile, faith and patience and experienced peace no matter how long something threatened to last for or how frustrating something threatened to be. I pictured someone happy and calm as ever while a series of stormy, time-consuming, challenging events kept appearing and trying to break that person’s resolve to remain steadfast in patience.

In light of what Martin’s characters said about bravery, I wondered whether the only time you can truly persevere is when you are faced with a long, frustrating wait. Maybe perseverance only comes once you have waited longer than you thought you ever could. Down the rocky, seemingly endless road called “Waiting,” maybe there is a point where the maps stop plotting the route, where you’ve done all you could do to navigate yourself through the territory of Waiting, you have thrown your compass in the woods off the road in frustration so that you have no idea where to go, and you pass a sign that reads “Congratulations, You Have Persevered!”

What do you think? Can we still persevere even when we are ready to give up? Then what?

 Perhaps a state of perseverance can only be achieved once we have passed the point of patient waiting and peaceful faith and have come to the point of panicky stress and precarious bewilderment. Perhaps at that point, at which we have gone further than we thought possible, we have reached that state of grace (like in the definition above)—that state of grace in which we stop hoping or trying for something specific to happen, boldly walk past that sign that reads, “Congratulations, You Have Persevered!” throw our situation up in the air and let God have a chance to catch it in His hands and do something about it. Is that where perseverance can be found? Is that how we reach a state of glory?

“You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you, there is more of God and His rule.” Matthew 5:3, The Message